Archive for the ‘My Thoughts & Feelings about Gambling’ Category

Anything for Bookies to Make a Buck

Sunday, April 27th, 2008


It’s bad enough the casino’s have infiltrated the lives of people around the world to the point where we don’t just have to deal with them on vacation, but in our everyday lives, but what the heck is the deal with making odds for TV talent shows?

I was just doing a little research for my Andrew Johnston Squidoo Lens when I came across this article from My Park Magazine. They are making odds on who will win Britain’s Got Talent, if Amanda Holden will cry when Andrew sings during the final, and if he will have a number one single this year. Does society need to put odds on everything? When will it stop?

Do I think the government needs to step in on something like this, NO? I don’t believe in government regulation. I think the bookies should take a look inside and really take a look at what they are putting odds on. Will it happen? I know the answer is no. There is a reason that these people are bookies and not book store owners. They don’t care who gets hurt when they are trying to make a living for themselves.

I hope Andrew Johnston doesn’t realize that there are odds out there on him; imagine the kids at school then if he doesn’t win. I can hear it already “My mom can’t afford to buy me new shoes anymore because she put our life savings on you to make Amanda Holden cry and you didn’t” and then a big fat pow in the face.

If the people that bet on this type of thing would just stop, the bookies would possibly stop wasting their time with odds on this type of thing, until then, I guess I have my blog to rant on.

Am I off base here?


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Staying with my Gambling Husband - Part 2

Saturday, February 23rd, 2008

About a week ago, I started a series about why I stay with Q, who is a compulsive gambler. Since then, I have really started to do some soul searching and introspecting. I really think that the second reason I stay with Q has to do with the fact that I thrive on stress. I’m one of those people that is constantly late for everything, partially because I’m busy and I try to get that one last thing done, but I think another reason I’m always late has to do with the fact that I like the adrenaline rush that I get when I’m late. At the time, I hate it, but I always seem to go back to this ugly habit.

Back to what this has to do with Q. His gambling has caused unnecessary stress on our relationship and in a backwards twisted sort of way, I really do think that I thrive on this. He goes and gambles and I build another Squidoo page, he gambles and I go and list more games for sale on the website. I know this sounds quite weird, but I think this is a big part of why we are still married.

Let me know what you think. If you’re working through a similar situation, I would really like to hear from you.


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Reasons Why I Stay With My Gambling Husband

Tuesday, February 12th, 2008

If you have read some of the previous posts in my blog you may wonder why the heck I’m still with my husband. Over the next month, I’ll be exploring those reasons myself.

Reason number 1 why I stay with Q - He really is a good guy. He’s a little insecure, but a good guy. When we first started dating he was very unsure about the fact that I made more money than he did and I think this still bothers him, but he’s not as verbal about it. As much as I try to get it through his thick skull that I have a college degree and he doesn’t, many times he still just doesn’t get it. I think his gambling problem grew out of this insecurity, instead of trying to better himself he’d try to go and win the big jackpot at the casino instead. Once he looked at what was left of his paycheck, he’d start to chase the losses and try to win it back; before he knew it, his whole paycheck was gone. There were times when instead of taking what he had to try and buy me something nice, he’d take the money to the casino to try and make more and buy something even better. His heart was in the right place, but they way he went about making the extra money just doesn’t work.

Yes, the gambling still started out as greed, but I really think his intentions when this all started were just to help us out and better our life. We are still fighting the battle of getting it through his think skull that this method of making money just doesn’t work.


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I Know I should Stop Psychoanalyzing

Sunday, January 13th, 2008

It has been a long time since my last post, but I think I may have taken too much onto my plate over the holidays. Now that things have slowed down, I should be able to get back into a routine for myself again.

In several articles and in “Behind the 8 Ball” I have read many times that a person dealing with a problem gambler should not psychoanalyze their loved one with a gambling problem. I think the reasoning behind this is to keep yourself from going crazy due to the fact that you cannot figure out the triggers that make your loved one go to the casino. This has definitely been the situation behind my case. Q stopped recycling for a while and during that time proceeded to go to the casino so I thought that maybe the recycling was taking place of the gambling rush. Unfortunately, he just recently started recycling again, but then took the money he made to the casino. On the other hand, we have had a home improvement project recently rear its ugly head for this coming summer so maybe the costs behind that were the trigger?

See what I mean? Trying to figure out all of his triggers could land myself in the loony bin if I’m not careful. However, the accountant in me keeps saying this general ledger account is out of balance and I need to figure out the problem before I can sleep at night. I’m a problem solver by nature and I just cannot sit idly by and watch Q stay out of balance.

So, what’s my whole point here? Even though many of the books I read are correct and have been extremely helpful in getting myself back on track, I cannot listen to all of the advice that has been given by them. Not every person is a textbook case and we often need to do what we feel is best for ourselves to stay sane. What I have done is stop psychoanalyzing Q to his face in our conversations regarding the casino and I think this has helped.



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Rethinking my thoughts about legalized Gambling

Tuesday, October 30th, 2007

When I first started this blog, I posted my feelings on banning gambling. I don’t agree with the government controlling the lives of everyone, but the more I think and write about what Q’s gambling addiction has done to our family, the more I am torn on my position.

Gambling has put my household in an extreme predicament to digging out of a hole that seems never-ending. In Wisconsin, where I live, we have the 5th highest tax burden in the country according to this CNN article. Now, let’s take into consideration that according to our LONG overdue budget, our Indian Casinos here in the state are budgeted to pay $75 million to the state of WI in the 07-08 fiscal year and $79 million in the 08-09 fiscal year. Where would our tax burden be without these payments? I’m not really sure right now, but I’ll try to do the math for a later post.

I’m sure a lot of the money these casinos are making is coming from households with children that can’t afford to be losing money because they should be feeding their children. In turn, the state turns around and feeds the children with food stamps and other such programs, so how much money is the state really making? Right now we are just subsidizing our state budget with the broken dreams of families in a downward spiral.

Let me know what you think.



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A sad tale of Gambling Addiction

Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007

The Widows Story - Gambling Addiction at Destiny.org

It is stories such as the one that I’m referring to today that really trip my trigger. Tales like this are so sad and Q and I have both seen it. When Q would still talk to me about going to the casino he would talk about these old people that he would see every day, sitting at the same machine day in and day out. Many have lost their life savings and even their homes because they just can’t seem to find anything to divert their attentions from the dings and lights at the casino.

I often wonder if someone, besides the cashiers at the casino, were to pay more attention to them if they would be able work through their addiction. I’m talking about someone that wouldn’t lecture them or even talk about their gambling problem, but just someone for the person to hang with at a place other than the casino once in a while during the week.

I worry about Q becoming like this if something were to happen to me. I have often thought about setting up a trust fund with stipulations for withdrawal and a trusted family member as the trustee. Unfortunately, this would put me back into the position of the enabler even in my death.

Let me know what you think.



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